Posts Tagged ‘funny’

There’s an ALIEN in my tea-cup!

Monday, November 5, 2007

Hey everyone!

Before I start remember that you have to start reading from the next page and work your way backwards :-P

In Sicily at Giovanni’s place we didn’t really do much. For three days there, there were bad thunder and lightning storms, but it was really cool to watch because you could see the ocean from the room my parents were in.

Since we still didn’t have a car, Giovanni found one for us and brought my parents to go see it… when they came back I was utterly shocked at what they had bought… it was one of those little, white fiat-unos… it did the job though and was very handy for our great escape of Sicily :-P !

Giovanni also said that he’d help find us a house… what he found is not quite what I’d call a house…

We stayed at his bed and breakfast for three weeks, our pastimes usually long, late barbeques. After we got the car though we did go out and about seeing places a lot. Giovanni’s fiancé’s mother was fixing up a “house” for rent and we just happened to be in need of a house. So Giovanni, like any sales person would put two and two together and brought us around to this so-called “house”…

We went around it… this took a very short time :-P as to how small it was. Apparently it was furnished, which consisted of 4 beds, the bathroom, a dining table… and a stove. WOW, great going with the furnishing :-P .

It had five rooms (in total, yes in total, not just the bedrooms). Three bedrooms, the bathroom and the kitchen/dining room which she promised she’d tile and never got around to it. It did have a good sized garden though and a grape vineyard 2 minutes walk from the house. The garden was full of orange and lemon trees and even prickly pear cacti… the rest of the garden though was absolutely overgrown… everywhere.

We took the house since it was the only thing we could find, I know it was a stupid decision but awk well too late now :-P .

We were in soon enough (the picture dates tell me that it was 16th of April, and we’d only taken these at least a week of being in the house) and had settled down. My mom decided to fly back to England to her mom and Gizmo since Karen (my mom’s mom) was taking so long in packing to get herself over to Sicily with us.

My mom kissed us goodbye, she got on the plane and off she went. The next three weeks droned on and on and on for the three of us. We were sick of sitting in the house, or playing jack-change-it (a card game, the rules continuously increased as we got more bored… in the end it was hard to keep up :-P ).

To understand Giovanni you’d have to have known him… he was like a snake with a smile. He’d become your friend and rip you off at the same time in fact one of his favourite phrases to use on us was “my friend”… it’s very frustrated to think that we fell for him. Then again the more that I think about I don’t think he realised. Some Sicilians (mainly Giovanni :-P ) are the type like I help you, now you must help me… or in Giovanni’s case it was more like I help you… now you must pay me :-P .

The first few days in the house were… there’s actually no real word to describe it. I just sat here for 5 minutes trying to think of one and… none! Well… in the third day or so I was about to go run a bath for myself and ended up running to my parents room yelling “There’s an ALIEN in the bath!!!”… it was not funny at the time :-P .

It was seriously an alien-like creature. It was light amber-brown, had a long-spindly body with… literally millions of LONG legs and antennas. I know you’re thinking oh that’s just a centipede… that was NOT a centipede!

We found tonnes in that Sicilian house, so since I found the first one it has adopted the name of “alien” so from now on don’t be alarmed if I refer to something like, “there was an alien in the tea-cup!” … this did happen once. My sister almost had a heat attack when she was making tea :-P … now that was funny!

Actually one night in our room (we were sharing one in that house) there was an alien on the wall and a gecko on the other. Venetia refused to sleep unless I got at least the gecko out. So I got my jewellery box, dumped everything on my bed, made the gecko come down of the wall. By about a few inches of the ground the poor thing fainted and fell to the floor. I was so devastated and just wanted to leave it alone. Venetia on the other hand kept moaning and wouldn’t go to sleep >:-(! So I ushered the gecko into the box and put the lid on top. Now Venetia wanted me to put the gecko outside. No way that I was going out there at this time of night! So I let it loose in the kitchen :-P .

Of course Venetia was not happy about this but I was too tired. I climbed into bed and was almost asleep when I was disturbed by a crazy creature… known as, yes that’s right, Venetia. Apparently now I had to get the alien out. I got up dragged Venetia’s bed with her still on it to my side of the room and tried to go to sleep again. Nope this wasn’t good enough :-P . I said that I’d get the alien down but she’d have to put it in a box.

I put Venetia’s bed back, got the broom and swept the alien off the wall, then climbed back into bed…now the alien had gone under the wall… after Venetia doing what she needed to do, even though I said if she did it I’d never talk to her again, we went to sleep. The next morning I was talking again >.<.

As I’m sure you can see I talk far too much :-P . So I’m going to leave it at that and get back on track with it tomorrow.

Still hoping to hear from you all soon :-P !

- Bianca

Save The Bees!

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Hey Everyone!

Every Morning the first thing I do on my computer is check Yahoo! News. This morning I found some really interesting videos. The bees are slowly dying! A beehive owner found his beehives to be abandoned one day, no bees in sight, not even dead ones! Apparently it’s because of a relatively new nicotine based insecticide that slows the immune system of insects including cute, little bumblebees. Yes they can give quite a sting, but amazingly their venom is actually good for you. It strengthens your immune system… unless of course you are allergic then… well the bees aren’t good news for you :-P .

Lots of fruits rely on bees (wow, this sounds like one of those boring things that you have to read and then answer questions about in school, urgh!)… for instance blueberries because of their difficult to get into urn shaped flowers, they are very hard to populate.

Now what was the shape of the blueberry flower? Yes, that’s correct an URN shape. Well done! No I’m only joking, I’ll carry on with some (slightly) more interesting… stories now :-P .

On our last few days staying in Palermo, we looked around at a few houses… these didn’t interest us much… well the one was absolutely lovely … but the guy who wanted to rent it would only be ready in six months time! So this wouldn’t really work for us…

So we went into an internet café, since we were staying in a bed and breakfast by this stage and they didn’t have an open access to internet options. We were looking for another B&B and “something” just seemed to take my sisters fancy to the west of the country, on an interactive map. We clicked on it and it brought up a list of B&B’s.

We found one that took our liking. On the website it said he could speak Italian, English (Woo Hoo!) and Spanish… we called him up and yes he could speak English… later we found out that he just put Spanish on for the sake of it and that he couldn’t really speak that. But it didn’t matter because he spoke English :-P !

Now the question was how where we going to get there. It was quite far down and we didn’t have a car yet. So we just took a long trip on a… long trip bus, stopping at a hotel for the night before we were booked into (Okay I’m going to give him a fake name, because personally, he doesn’t know I’m writing this and if he ever googles himself, like we know we all do, come on admit it, then that won’t be so great) Giovanni’s place (Italian enough name there :-P ).

The bus was supposed to drop us off, close enough to the hotel but we accidentally got off too early thinking that it had stopped for good and then off it went again we were like (:-O! So my dad and I went to find a taxi… later to find out that, what are the odds, this town only has one or two! Soon we found one; he was an old-ish guy sleeping in the front of his car. The newsagent man that told us that he was the taxi guy, yelled across the street and woke him up :-P . Then off we went to our hotel, phew!

Oh actually the first time we ever took the bus in Sicily we were kicked off it! Not because we were naughty or anything… mainly because we didn’t know we had to STAMP the ticket in the ticket machine. How mean of them! No-one actually does unless the inspector comes on the bus, because if you don’t you can just use it for a different bus journey.

Yes, so to carry on with what I was saying, we took the bus, stayed in a hotel for the night called Villa Favourita. It was really cool, instead of a big building with rooms… you had your own detached IGLOO! Yes an igloo… or close enough to one anyway. It was a giant white dome shaped thing… tonnes of them just plopped down in an open area with orange and lemon trees growing around, on the sides of the paths… Venetia and I also recorded there as well… we were just messing around though… no real footage :-P .

There was this thing on top of the netted football section by our igloo and we thought it was a slice of toast… don’t ask us how it got there it just did! So we tried to get it down by throwing our ball up and whacking it (how old are we :-P )… it just kept “rolling” back to the middle of the net though, in the end we realised that it was a just a stone… PRETENDING to be a slice of toast! It was so funny!

The next morning we were up nice and early, it wasn’t the best of days but it was nice enough. We had arranged for “Giovanni” to come pick us up from the hotel to take us to his place.

He arrived looking like any Sicilian does at this time of year. In an abnormally large black jacket and sunglasses. We packed up our suitcases and he took us to his place. Once we arrived he brought us upstairs, showed us our rooms then he dragged my dad downstairs and took him shopping for a barbeque that he wanted to have with us…

The one good thing that we learnt from Giovanni was that lemon juice on a sausage is… AMAZING! It has to be the nicest way to eat barbequed meat! Seriously you have to try it!

Giovanni was …. quite a character. He took us fishing once… it only lasted about 15 minutes… the worm that was destined to the hook BIT him as a desperate, final move! It was an evil looking thing (the worm was too :-P ). No really. The worm looked like something out of the movie Men in Black, it’s whole mouth opened wide and a new… I don’t know what you’d call it… a tongue maybe with incisors on it… it was really nasty…! They are sea worms. We’d gotten so many in the box and because of the fact that we had only fished for 15 minutes, we still had all of those biting worms. So Giovanni threw them all into the water and off they swam or stuck to a piece of seaweed.. they were really weird!

Right, well I’ll leave it at that, don’t want to freak you out too much. See I eventually got back around to fishing!

Hope to hear from you soon.

- Bianca

O-Fish-All Rant!

Sunday, July 8, 2007

Okay so… Hey everyone! Welcome to Kiss My Fishy the Oh-fish-all Website (ha ha, how funny am I?… actually, don’t answer that :-P )!!!

I know kissing a fish doesn’t sound so great…and doesn’t taste so FLY (wait that’s a frog joke right?…) either. But I had to… well I was willing to, but only because it WAS a bet. I have no secret life :-P .

Well to start off, we start from the most obvious place, the end. I kissed a fish! Yes I’m sure you can tell by now because of the name, the WHOLE site and of course the pictures (Yep that’s me)!

My name’s Bianca Cassandra P. I’m 13… and 7 months (oooh how precise)! And yep I kissed a fish (wow…. I’m very repetitive, repetitive, repetitive)… Well recently we (my mom, my dad, my sister and my dog) moved to South-west of France. We’d been living in Ireland for 10 years before and have only been living in France for 3 months now.

On one day in the second month of being here, my dad and I went down to the lake, that’s about 5 minutes walk from the house, to go fishing. Usually I ROCK at fishing… but this night was different /:-O… Dun dun DUNNN! No really, in two or so hours of fishing we’d catch a few, one night my mom and I even caught at least 20 (Of course we always throw the fish back… so it could’ve been the same fish, latching onto the bait, getting pulled in, taken off the hook, thrown back in, swimming around for a few minutes, saw that giant blob of orange again, got caught, reeled in, unhooked, thrown back in and so on and so on and so on)!!!

Like I was saying, this night was different, my dad and I hadn’t caught any yet and we’d moved up and down the lake and had been fishing for at least a good half-hour (good for the fish anyway ;-P). So my dad came up with a game. Who ever caught the first fish of the night, no matter what the size (even though in these pictures this fish is the general size of the catch we catch) the other person would have to kiss it.

Well the first fish was caught by… drum roll please… my dad! Hints, who’s kissing the fish in the pictures… me! So my mom got the camera set up and…I kissed a fish!
It was DISGUSTING! The fish actually SUCKED my lip… Something I NEVER want to do again… but here’s my idea…

I would really love it if…. all of you readers who love to fish would kiss a fish for me and then send in your pictures. If you get a group of your fishing friends to go for a group-fishing trip then whoever catches the first fish, the rest MUST kiss it and you take the pictures!
Please ensure that the fish you are about to kiss does NOT have teeth!

As I’ve told you before we’re living in France now and I seldom hear English so all comments would be much appreciated…

Thanks, now start that FISHING FRENZY and get HOOKED on making your friends kiss your fishy!

- Bianca

P.S. You can send your pictures to kissmyfishy@gmail.com (Or rather use the new e-mail now! Dejamoicc@gmail.com : ))